书城文学生命是一场旅行(下)
3290000000004

第4章 成长的过程(4)

I asked him one day, soon after he"d retired to potter about his garden, what is was like to achieve all one"s ambitions. He looked down at his roses and went on watering them. Then he said "The only value in achieving one"s ambition is that you then realize that they are not worth achieving." Quickly he moved the conversation on to a more practical level, and within a moment we were back to a safe discussion on the weather. That was two years ago.

I recall this incident, for yesterday, I was passing his house, and had drawn up my cart just outside his garden wall. I had pulled in from the road for no other reason than to let a bus pass me. As I set there filling my pipe, I suddenly heard a shout of sheer joy come from the other side of the wall.

I peered over. There stood Sir Henry doing nothing less than a tribal war dance of sheer unashamed ecstasy. Even when he observed my bewildered face staring over the wall he did not seem put out or embarrassed, but shouted for me to climb over.

"Come and see, Jan. Look! I have done it at last! I have done it at last!"

There he was, holding a small box of earth in his hand. I observed three tiny shoots out of it.

"And there were only three!" he said, his eyes laughing to heaven.

"Three what?" I asked.

"Peach stones", he replied. "I"ve always wanted to make peach stones grow, even since I was a child, when I used to take them home after a party, or as a man after a banquet. And I used to plant them, and then forgot where I planted them. But now at last I have done it, and, what"s more, I had only three stones, and there you are, one, two, three shoots," he counted.

And Sir Henry ran off, calling for his wife to come and see his achievement-his achievement of simplicity.

仔细观察一个小孩,随便哪个小孩都行,你会发现,他每天都会发现一两件令他快乐的事情,尽管过一会儿他可能会哭哭啼啼。再看看一个大人,我们中间任何人都行。你会发现,一周复一周,一月又一月,他总是以无可奈何的心情迎接新的一天的到来,以温文尔雅、满不在乎的心情忍受这一天的消逝。确实,大多数人都跟罪人一样苦恼难受,尽管他们太百无聊赖,连罪恶都不犯——也许他们的冷漠就是他们的罪孽。真的,他们难得一笑。如果他们偶尔笑了,我们会认不出他们的容貌,他们的脸会扭曲走样,不再是我们习以为常的固定不变的面具。即使在笑的时候,大人也不会像小孩儿那样,小孩儿用眼睛表示笑意,大人只用嘴唇。这实际上不是笑,只是咧列嘴;表示一种心情,但跟快乐无关。然而,人人都能发现,人到了一定地步(但又有谁能解释这是什么地步呢?),成了老人,他又会笑了。

看起来,幸福同纯真的赤子之心有关系,幸福是一种能从最简单的事物里——譬如说,核桃——汲取快乐的能力。

幸福显然同成功毫不相干。因为亨利?斯图亚特爵士当然是个十分成功的人。20年前,他从伦敦来到我们的村子,买了好几座旧房屋,推倒后建了一所大房子。他把这所房子当作度周末的场所。他是位律师。我们村里的人带着一种几近父辈的骄傲心情追随他那辉煌的业绩。

我记得,大约十年前他被任命为王室法律顾问,阿莫斯和我看见他走下伦敦开来的火车便上前去表示祝贺。我们高兴地笑着;而他的表情却跟接到判刑通知书一样悲惨。他受封当爵士时也是如此,他没有一丝笑容,他甚至不屑于在蓝狐狸酒馆请我们大家喝杯酒。他对待成功就像小孩吃药一样,任何一项成就都未能使他疲惫的眼睛里露出一丝笑意。

他退休以后可以在花园里随便走走,干些轻松的闲活。有一天,我问他一个问题:一个人实现了一切雄心壮志是什么滋味?他低头看这玫瑰花,浇他的水。过了一会儿,他说:"实现雄心壮志的唯一价值是你发现他们都不值得追求。"他立刻改变话题讨论有实际意义的事情,我们很快谈论起万无一失的天气问题。这是两年前的事。

我想起这件事情,因为昨天我经过他的家,把我的大车停在他花园的院墙外边。我从大路把车赶到他花园外边是为了给一辆公共汽车让路。我坐在车上装烟斗时忽然听见院墙里面传来一声欣喜欲狂的欢呼。

我向墙内张望。里面是亨利爵士,他欢蹦乱跳像在跳部落出征的舞蹈,表现出毫无顾忌的真正的快乐。他发现了我在墙头张望的迷惑不解的面孔,他似乎毫不生气,也不感到窘迫,而是大声呼喊叫我爬过墙去。

"快来看,杰。看呀!我终于成功了!我终于成功了!"

他站在那里,手里拿着一小盒土。我发现土里有三颗小芽。

"就只有这三颗!"他眉开眼笑地说。

"三个什么东西?"我问。

"核桃。"他回答道,"我一直想种核桃,从小就想,当时我参加晚会后老是把核桃带回家,后来长大成人参加宴会后也这样。我以前常常种核桃,可是过后就忘了我种在什么地方。现在,我总算成功了。还有,我只有三个核桃。你瞧,一、二、三颗芽。"他数着说。

亨利爵士跑了起来,叫他的妻子来看他的成功之作——他的单纯纯朴的成功之作。

Catch of a Lifetime

一生的收获

He was 11 years old and went fishing every chance he got from the dock at his family’s cabin on an island in the middle of a New Hampshire lake.

On the day before the bass season opened, he and his father were fishing early in the evening, catching sunfish and perch with worms. Then he tied on a small silver lure and practiced casting. The lure struck the water and caused colored ripples in the sunset, then silver ripples as the moon rose over the lake.

When his peapole doubled over, he knew something huge was on the other end. His father watched with admiration as the boy skillfully worked the fish alongside the dock.

Finally, he very gingerly lifted the exhausted fish from the water. It was the largest one he had ever seen, but it was a bass.

The boy and his father looked at the handsome fish, gills playing back and forth in the moonlight. The father lit a match and looked at his watch. It was 10 P.M.-- two hours before the season opened. He looked at the fish, then at the boy.

“You’ll have to put it back, son,”he said.

“Dad!”cried the boy.

“There will be other fish,”said his father.

“Not as big as this one,”cried the boy.

He looked around the lake. No other fishermen or boats were anywhere around in the moonlight. He looked again at his father. Even though no one had seen them, nor could anyone ever know what time he caught the fish, the boy could tell by the clarity of his father’s voice that the decision was not negotiable. He slowly worked the hook out of the lip of the huge bass and lowered it into the black water.

The creature swished its powerful body and disappeared. The boy suspected that he would never again see such a great fish.

That was 34 years ago. Today, the boy is a successful architect in New York City. His father’s cabin is still there on the island in the middle of the lake. He takes his own son and daughters fishing from the same dock.

And he was right. He has never again caught such a magnificent fish as the one he landed that night long ago. But he does see that same fish-again and again-every time he comes up against a question of ethics.

For, as his father taught him, ethics are ****** matters of right and wrong. It is only the practice of ethics that is difficult. Do we do right when no one is looking? Do we refuse to cut corners to get the design in on time? Or refuse to trade stocks based on information that we know we aren’t supposed to have?

We would if we were taught to put the fish back when we were young. For we would have learned the truth. The decision to do right lives fresh and fragrant in our memory. It is a story we will proudly tell our friends and grandchildren. Not about how we had a chance to beat the system and took it, but about how we did the right thing and were forever strengthened.

他11岁那时,只要一有机会,就会到他家在新汉普郡湖心岛上的小屋的码头上钓鱼。

鲈鱼季节开放的前一天晚上,他和父亲早早开始垂钓,用小虫作饵钓太阳鱼和鲈鱼。他系上鱼饵,练习如何抛线。鱼钩击在水面,在夕阳中漾起一片金色的涟漪,夜晚月亮升出湖面时,涟漪就成了银色。

当鱼杆向下弯的时候,他知道线的另一端一定钓到了一条大鱼。父亲看着他技巧纯熟地在码头边沿和鱼周旋,眼神充满赞赏。

最后他小心翼翼地将筋疲力尽的鱼提出水面。这是他所见过的最大的一条,还是一条鲈鱼。

男孩和他父亲看着这条漂亮的鱼,它的鱼鳃在月光下一张一翕。父亲点燃一根火柴,看了看表。十点了——离开禁还有两个小时。他看了看鱼,又看了看男孩。

“你得把它放回去,孩子,”他说道。

“爸爸!”男孩叫道。

“还有其他的鱼嘛,”父亲说道。

“但没这么大,”男孩叫道。