Sweet leaves, shade folly. Who is he comes here?
Steps aside What, Longaville! and reading! listen, ear. BIRON Now, in thy likeness, one more fool appear!
Enter LONGAVILLE, with a paper LONGAVILLE Ay me, I am forsworn! BIRON Why, he comes in like a perjure, wearing papers. FERDINAND In love, I hope: sweet fellowship in shame! BIRON One drunkard loves another of the name. LONGAVILLE Am I the first that have been perjured so? BIRON I could put thee in comfort. Not by two that I know:
Thou makest the triumviry, the corner-cap of society, The shape of Love's Tyburn that hangs up simplicity. LONGAVILLE I fear these stubborn lines lack power to move:
O sweet Maria, empress of my love!
These numbers will I tear, and write in prose. BIRON O, rhymes are guards on wanton Cupid's hose:
Disfigure not his slop. LONGAVILLE This same shall go.
Reads Did not the heavenly rhetoric of thine eye, 'Gainst whom the world cannot hold argument, Persuade my heart to this false perjury?
Vows for thee broke deserve not punishment.
A woman I forswore; but I will prove, Thou being a goddess, I forswore not thee:
My vow was earthly, thou a heavenly love;Thy grace being gain'd cures all disgrace in me.
Vows are but breath, and breath a vapour is:
Then thou, fair sun, which on my earth dost shine, Exhalest this vapour-vow; in thee it is:
If broken then, it is no fault of mine:
If by me broke, what fool is not so wise To lose an oath to win a paradise? BIRON This is the liver-vein, which makes flesh a deity, A green goose a goddess: pure, pure idolatry.
God amend us, God amend! we are much out o' the way. LONGAVILLE By whom shall I send this?--Company! stay.
Steps aside BIRON All hid, all hid; an old infant play.
Like a demigod here sit I in the sky.
And wretched fools' secrets heedfully o'ereye.
More sacks to the mill! O heavens, I have my wish!
Enter DUMAIN, with a paper Dumain transform'd! four woodcocks in a dish! DUMAIN O most divine Kate! BIRON O most profane coxcomb! DUMAIN By heaven, the wonder in a mortal eye! BIRON By earth, she is not, corporal, there you lie. DUMAIN Her amber hair for foul hath amber quoted. BIRON An amber-colour'd raven was well noted. DUMAIN As upright as the cedar. BIRON Stoop, I say;Her shoulder is with child. DUMAIN As fair as day. BIRON Ay, as some days; but then no sun must shine. DUMAIN O that I had my wish! LONGAVILLE And I had mine! FERDINAND And I mine too, good Lord! BIRON Amen, so I had mine: is not that a good word? DUMAIN I would forget her; but a fever she Reigns in my blood and will remember'd be. BIRON A fever in your blood! why, then incision Would let her out in saucers: sweet misprision! DUMAIN Once more I'll read the ode that I have writ. BIRON Once more I'll mark how love can vary wit. DUMAIN [Reads]
On a day--alack the day!--
Love, whose month is ever May, Spied a blossom passing fair Playing in the wanton air:
Through the velvet leaves the wind, All unseen, can passage find;That the lover, sick to death, Wish himself the heaven's breath.
Air, quoth he, thy cheeks may blow;Air, would I might triumph so!
But, alack, my hand is sworn Ne'er to pluck thee from thy thorn;Vow, alack, for youth unmeet, Youth so apt to pluck a sweet!
Do not call it sin in me, That I am forsworn for thee;Thou for whom Jove would swear Juno but an Ethiope were;And deny himself for Jove, Turning mortal for thy love.
This will I send, and something else more plain, That shall express my true love's fasting pain.
O, would the king, Biron, and Longaville, Were lovers too! Ill, to example ill, Would from my forehead wipe a perjured note;For none offend where all alike do dote. LONGAVILLE [Advancing] Dumain, thy love is far from charity.
You may look pale, but I should blush, I know, To be o'erheard and taken napping so. FERDINAND [Advancing] Come, sir, you blush; as his your case is such;You chide at him, offending twice as much;You do not love Maria; Longaville Did never sonnet for her sake compile, Nor never lay his wreathed arms athwart His loving bosom to keep down his heart.
I have been closely shrouded in this bush And mark'd you both and for you both did blush:
I heard your guilty rhymes, observed your fashion, Saw sighs reek from you, noted well your passion:
Ay me! says one; O Jove! the other cries;One, her hairs were gold, crystal the other's eyes:
To LONGAVILLE You would for paradise break faith, and troth;To DUMAIN And Jove, for your love, would infringe an oath.
What will Biron say when that he shall hear Faith so infringed, which such zeal did swear?
How will he scorn! how will he spend his wit!
How will he triumph, leap and laugh at it!
For all the wealth that ever I did see, I would not have him know so much by me. BIRON Now step I forth to whip hypocrisy.
Advancing Ah, good my liege, I pray thee, pardon me!
Good heart, what grace hast thou, thus to reprove These worms for loving, that art most in love?
Your eyes do make no coaches; in your tears There is no certain princess that appears;You'll not be perjured, 'tis a hateful thing;Tush, none but minstrels like of sonneting!
But are you not ashamed? nay, are you not, All three of you, to be thus much o'ershot?
You found his mote; the king your mote did see;But I a beam do find in each of three.
O, what a scene of foolery have I seen, Of sighs, of groans, of sorrow and of teen!
O me, with what strict patience have I sat, To see a king transformed to a gnat!
To see great Hercules whipping a gig, And profound Solomon to tune a jig, And Nestor play at push-pin with the boys, And critic Timon laugh at idle toys!
Where lies thy grief, O, tell me, good Dumain?
And gentle Longaville, where lies thy pain?
And where my liege's? all about the breast:
A caudle, ho! FERDINAND Too bitter is thy jest.
Are we betray'd thus to thy over-view? BIRON Not you to me, but I betray'd by you:
I, that am honest; I, that hold it sin To break the vow I am engaged in;I am betray'd, by keeping company With men like men of inconstancy.
When shall you see me write a thing in rhyme?