LONDON,January 15,1753
MY DEAR FRIEND:I never think my time so well employed,as when I think it employed to your advantage.You have long had the greatest share of it;you now engross it.The moment is now decisive;the piece is going to be exhibited to the public;the mere out lines and the general coloring are not sufficient to attract the eyes and to secure applause;but the last finishing,artful,and delicate strokes are necessary.
Skillful judges will discern and acknowledge their merit;the ignorant will,without knowing why,feel their power.In that view,I have thrown together,for your perusal,some maxims;or,to speak more properly,observations on men and things;for I have no merit as to the invention:
I am no system monger;and,instead of giving way to my imagination,I have only consulted my memory;and my conclusions are all drawn from facts,not from fancy.Most maxim mongers have preferred the prettiness to the justness of a thought,and the turn to the truth;but I have refused myself to everything that my own experience did not justify and confirm.I wish you would consider them seriously,and separately,and recur to them again 'pro re nata'in similar cases.Young men are as apt to think themselves wise enough,as drunken men are to think themselves sober enough.They look upon spirit to be a much better thing than experience;which they call coldness.They are but half mistaken;for though spirit,without experience,is dangerous,experience,without spirit,is languid and defective.Their union,which is very rare,is perfection;you may join them,if you please;for all my experience is at your service;and I do not desire one grain of your spirit in return.
Use them both,and let them reciprocally animate and check each other.
I mean here,by the spirit of youth,only the vivacity and presumption of youth,which hinder them from seeing the difficulties or dangers of an undertaking,but I do not mean what the silly vulgar call spirit,by which they are captious,jealous of their rank,suspicious of being undervalued,and tart (as they call it)in their repartees,upon the slightest occasions.This is an evil,and a very silly spirit,which should be driven out,and transferred to an herd of swine.This is not the spirit of a man of fashion,who has kept good company.People of an ordinary,low education,when they happen to fail into good company,imagine themselves the only object of its attention;if the company whispers,it is,to be sure,concerning them;if they laugh,it is at them;and if anything ambiguous,that by the most forced interpretation can be applied to them,happens to be said,they are convinced that it was meant at them;upon which they grow out of countenance first,and then angry.This mistake is very well ridiculed in the "Stratagem,"where Scrub says,I AM SURE THEY TALKED OF ME FOR THEY LAUGHEDCONSUMEDLY.A well-bred man seldom thinks,but never seems to think himself slighted,undervalued,or laughed at in company,unless where it is so plainly marked out,that his honor obliges him to resent it in a proper manner;'mais les honnetes gens ne se boudent jamais'.I will admit that it is very difficult to command one's self enough,to behave with ease,frankness,and good-breeding toward those,who one knows dislike,slight,and injure one,as far as they can,without personal consequences ;but I assert that it is absolutely necessary to do it:you must embrace the man you hate,if you cannot be justified in knocking him down;for otherwise you avow the injury which you cannot revenge.