'Suaviter in modo'was my law and my prophets;and if I pleased (between you and me)it was much more owing to that,than to any superior knowledge or merit of my own.Apropos,the word PLEASING puts one always in mind of Lady Hervey;pray tell her,that I declare her responsible to me for your pleasing;that I consider her as a pleasing Falstaff,who not only pleases,herself,but is the cause of pleasing in others;that Iknow she can make anything of anybody;and that,as your governess,if she does not make you please,it must be only because she will not,and not because she cannot.I hope you are 'dubois don't on en fait';and if so,she is so good a sculptor,that I am sure she can give you whatever form she pleases.A versatility of manners is as necessary in social,as a versatility of parts is in political life.One must often yield,in order to prevail;one must humble one's self,to be exalted;one must,like St.Paul,become all things to all men,to gain some;and,by the way,men are taken by the same means,'mutatis mutandis',that women are gained--by gentleness,insinuation,and submission:and these lines of Mr.Dryden will hold to a minister as well as to a mistress:
"The prostrate lover,when he lowest lies,But stoops to conquer,and but kneels to rise."In the course of the world,the qualifications of the chameleon are often necessary;nay,they must be carried a little further,and exerted a little sooner;for you should,to a certain degree,take the hue of either the man or the woman that you want,and wish to be upon terms with.'A propos',have you yet found out at Paris,any friendly and hospitable Madame de Lursay,'qui veut bien se charger du soin de vous eduquer'?And have you had any occasion of representing to her,'qu'elle faisoit donc des noeuds'?But I ask your,pardon,Sir,for the abruptness of the question,and acknowledge that I am meddling with matters that are out of my department.However,in matters of less importance,I desire to be 'de vos secrets le fidele depositaire'.Trust me with the general turn and color of your amusements at Paris.Is it 'le fracas du grand monde,comedies,bals,operas,cour,'etc.?Or is it 'des petites societes,moins bruyantes,mais pas pour cela moins agreables'?Where are you the most 'etabli'?Where are you 'le petit Stanhope?Voyez vous encore jour,a quelque arrangement honnete?Have you made many acquaintances among the young Frenchmen who ride at your Academy;and who are they?Send to me this sort of chit-chat in your letters,which,by the bye,I wish you would honor me with somewhat oftener.If you frequent any of the myriads of polite Englishmen who infest Paris,who are they?Have you finished with Abbe Nolet,and are you 'au fait'of all the properties and effects of air?.Were I inclined to quibble,I would say,that the effects of air,at least,are best to be learned of Marcel.If you have quite done with l'Abbes Nolet,ask my friend l'Abbe Sallier to recommend to you some meagre philomath,to teach you a little geometry and astronomy;not enough to absorb your attention and puzzle your intellects,but only enough not to be grossly ignorant of either.I have of late been a sort of 'astronome malgre moi',by bringing in last Monday into the House of Lords a bill for reforming our present Calendar and taking the New Style.Upon which occasion I was obliged to talk some astronomical jargon,of which I did not understand one word,but got it by heart,and spoke it by rote from a master.
I wished that I had known a little more of it myself;and so much I would have you know.But the great and necessary knowledge of all is,to know,yourself and others:this knowledge requires great attention and long experience;exert the former,and may you have the latter!Adieu!
P.S.I have this moment received your letters of the 27th February,and the 2d March,N.S.The seal shall be done as soon as possible.I am,glad that you are employed in Lord Albemarle's bureau;it will teach you,at least,the mechanical part of that business,such as folding,entering,and docketing letters;for you must not imagine that you are let into the 'fin fin'of the correspondence,nor indeed is it fit that you should,at,your age.However,use yourself to secrecy as to the letters you either read or write,that in time you may be trusted with SECRET,VERY SECRET,SEPARATE,APART,etc.I am sorry that this business interferes with your riding;I hope it is seldom;but I insist upon its not interfering with your dancing-master,who is at this time the most useful and necessary of all the masters you have or can have.