He not only forgot himself so far as to kiss her hand --he adopted a gentleness of tone in answering her which, in such a case, was little better than a compromise with sin.`I will come, dearest,' he said, `on condition that we don't speak of this hateful subject again.' Never had I seen and heard our Christian Hero to less advantage than on this occasion.
Before another word could be said by anybody, a thundering knock at the street door startled us all.I looked through the window, and saw the World, the Flesh, and the Devil waiting before the house--as typified in a carriage and horses, a powdered footman, and three of the most audaciously dressed women I ever beheld in my life.
Rachel started, and composed herself.She crossed the room to her mother.
`They have come to take me to the flower-show,' she said.`One word, mamma, before I go.I have not distressed you, have I?'
(Is the bluntness of moral feeling which could ask such a question as that, after what had just happened, to be pitied or condemned? I like to lean towards mercy.Let us pity it.)The drops had produced their effect.My poor aunt's complexion was like itself again.`No, no, my dear,' she said.`Go with our friends, and enjoy yourself.'
Her daughter stooped, and kissed her.I had left the window, and was near the door, when Rachel approached it to go out.Another change had come over her--she was in tears.I looked with interest at the momentary softening of that obdurate heart.I felt inclined to say a few earnest words.Alas! my well-meant sympathy only gave offence.`What do you mean by pitying me?' she asked in a bitter whisper, as she passed to the door.
`Don't you see how happy I am? I'm going to the flower-show, Clack; and I've got the prettiest bonnet in London.' She completed the hollow mockery of that address by blowing me a kiss--and so left the room.
I wish I could describe in words the compassion I felt for this miserable and misguided girl.But I am almost as poorly provided with words as with money.Permit me to say--my heart bled for her.
Returning to my aunt's chair, I observed dear Mr.Godfrey searching for something softly, here and there, in different parts of the room.Before I could offer to assist him he had found what he wanted.He came back to my aunt and me, with his declaration of innocence in one hand, and with a box of matches in the other.
`Dear aunt, a little conspiracy!' he said.`Dear Miss Clack, a pious fraud which even your high moral rectitude will excuse! Will you leave Rachel to suppose that I accept the generous self-sacrifice which has signed this paper? And will you kindly bear witness that I destroy it in your presence, before I leave the house?' He kindled a match, and, lighting the paper, laid it to burn in a plate on the table.`Any trifling inconvenience that I may suffer is as nothing,' he remarked, `compared with the importance of preserving that pure name from the contaminating contact of the world.
There! We have reduced it to a little harmless heap of ashes; and our dear impulsive Rachel will never know what we have done! How do you feel? My precious friends, how do you feel? For my poor part, I am as light-hearted as a boy!'
He beamed on us with his beautiful smile; he held out a hand to my aunt, and a hand to me.I was too deeply affected by his noble conduct to speak.
I closed my eyes; I put his hand, in a kind of spiritual self-forgetfulness, to my lips.He murmured a soft remonstrance.Oh the ecstasy, the pure, unearthly ecstasy of that moment! I sat--I hardly know on what--quite lost in my own exalted feelings.When I opened my eyes again, it was like descending from heaven to earth.There was nobody but my aunt in the room.He had gone.
I should like to stop here--I should like to close my narrative with the record of Mr.Godfrey's noble conduct.Unhappily, there is more, much more, which the unrelenting pecuniary pressure of Mr.Blake's cheque obliges me to tell.The painful disclosures which were to reveal themselves in my presence, during that Tuesday's visit to Montagu Square, were not at an end yet.
Finding myself alone with Lady Verinder, I turned naturally to the subject of her health; touching delicately on the strange anxiety which she had shown to conceal her indisposition, and the remedy applied to it, from the observation of her daughter.
My aunt's reply greatly surprised me.
`Drusilla,' she said (if I have not already mentioned that my Christian name is Drusilla, permit me to mention it now), `you are touching--quite innocently, I know--on a very distressing subject.'
I rose immediately.Delicacy left me but one alternative--the alternative, after first making my apologies, of taking my leave.Lady Verinder stopped me, and insisted on my sitting down again.
`You have surprised a secret,' she said, `which I had confided to my sister Mrs.Ablewhite, and to my lawyer Mr.Bruff, and to no one else.
I can trust in their discretion; and I am sure, when I tell you the circumstances, I can trust in yours.Have you any pressing engagement, Drusilla? or is your time your own this afternoon?'
It is needless to say that my time was entirely at my aunt's disposal.
`Keep me company then,' she said, `for another hour.I have something to tell you which I believe you will be sorry to hear.And I shall have a service to ask of you afterwards, if you don't object to assist me.'
It is again needless to say that, so far from objecting, I was all eagerness to assist her.
`You can wait her,' she went on, `till Mr.Bruff comes at five.And you can be one of the witnesses, Drusilla, when I sign my Will.'
Her Will! I thought of the drops which I had seen in her workbox.Ithought of the bluish tinge which I had noticed in her complexion.A light which was not of this world--a light shining prophetically from an unmade grave--dawned on my mind.My aunt's secret was a secret no longer.