书城外语当英语也成为时尚:猫咪伴我行
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第5章 The Cat in the Bag 袋子里的猫

By Arnold Fine

题记:When my aunt's beloved feline died,she prayed to see her pet again in heaven。Did this cat have nine lives?

Aunt Faye and her cat Sophie were inseparable。In fact,though Aunt Faye never had any children,Sophie was like a child to her。

I have to admit that the cat was amazing。Sophie always knew when Aunt Faye wasn't feeling well。In fact,Sophie even knew when Aunt Faye's feet were cold at night。Because that cat would snuggle up at her feet in bed,Aunt Faye used to call Sophie her“bed warmer。”My aunt was sort of hard of hearing,so when anyone came to the door of her apartment,Sophie ran to the door to alert her。

Good old Sophie,the cat,was getting on in years。My aunt would call me from time to time to ask me to drive Sophie and her to the veterinarian。In fact,I think she took better care of Sophie than herself。If Aunt Faye didn't feel well,she wouldn't go to the doctor;she would just take an aspirin。But should Sophie sneeze or cough with a hairball in her throat,we were on our way to the vet almost immediately。

So it came as a bit of a shock when Aunt Faye called me,crying hysterically,“Sophie is dead!My little Sophie is dead!”

Between sobs,Aunt Faye explained,“You know I don't sleep so good at night。So the doctor gave me some sleeping pills。I didn't like the way they smelled,so he told me to put a drop of vanilla extract into the bottle to make the pills taste like candy。This morning when I was cooking in the kitchen,Sophie got into my bedroom and accidentally knocked over my bottle of sleeping pills。They must have smelled good to her because she ate almost every last one of them。The empty bottle was on the floor next to her。”

Aunt Faye was still crying uncontrollably。“You know how long my Sophie and I have been together?”Not even waiting for my answer she said,“We've been together for twelve years。Yesterday,I even bought her a new cat food。They said this cat food was softer for older cats……Her teeth have started to fall out like mine。Do you know how much Sophie meant to me?”

I sympathized with her。

“Now what can I do?”she sobbed。

“I'm so sorry,Aunt Faye,there isn't much you can do。Put Sophie's body in a paper bag,and place it in the garbage can in the basement。The sanitation department will take her away。”

“What?”she screamed,“My Sophie in a garbage can?She was like my child。Since your uncle passed away,she's been my closest friend for all these years。I can't just put her in the garbage!”“Okay。”I said,“I'm working very late tonight so I won't be able to get over to your house。However,if you'll feel better about it,take a taxi to your veterinarian and ask him to have Sophie taken to the animal cemetery。I'll provide the money for the plot and the burial。”

The tears continued,“Will I be able to visit her from time to time?”

“Sure。I'll take you to the pet cemetery any time you want to go。”

“How can I take Sophie to the vet?Her carrying case fell apart a few years ago。”

“Put her in your old suitcase。It's not too big and Sophie will fit perfectly。”

“Will there be a funeral?”

“No,dear。The vet calls the people from the pet cemetery。They'll put Sophie in a little casket and take her to the cemetery。”

“Okay。”she muttered with a broken heart。“It will be dignified?”she asked。

“Yes,it will。”I said。

That was it。I felt bad for her,but there was nothing more I could do。

About six o'clock that evening,Aunt Faye called me at my office。“Arnold,I have something to tell you。”Strangely,I sensed excitement in her voice。

“Did you go to the vet?”I asked。

“I did just like you said。I put Sophie in my suitcase。I was standing by the bus stop waiting for a cab,so I figured,why spend money for a taxi when I could certainly take the bus?So I put the suitcase down next to me and started to look into my purse to see if I had the exact change。While I was looking in my pocketbook,some teenage boys came up behind me。One threw me to the ground and grabbed my suitcase with Sophie inside!”

“Oh no,Aunt Faye!Did you get hurt?”

“Just a few scratches。Nothing serious。I yelled for the police,but nobody came。So what could I do?I figured this was the way my relationship with Sophie was supposed to end。So I went home。”

“I don't believe this!”I said,trying to hold back my laughter,“Can you imagine the expression on those kids'faces when they opened the suitcase and found a dead cat?”

She started to laugh。Aunt Faye was actually laughing。

“Wait,wait-that's only part of the story。Sophie came home。She really wasn't dead。I only thought she was dead because she was lying so still when I found her in the bathroom this morning。Being jostled back and forth in that suitcase must have finally roused her。When I got back to the house,she was waiting at my door。”

“Arnold,thank you for all your help。I prayed for Sophie to enter heaven,and she came back to me。”

The next time I went to visit Aunt Faye,she had a little sign on her front door that read,“This is heaven。”

题记:当我姨妈钟爱的猫咪死去的时候,她向上帝祈祷,让她能在天国看见她的猫。这只猫有九条命吗?

费姨妈和她的猫苏菲互相依赖,难以分开。虽然费姨妈不曾有过孩子,但苏菲就像她的孩子一样。

我必须承认,这只猫非同寻常。她总能知道费姨妈什么时候身体不适,甚至还知道费姨妈什么时候夜里脚会凉,因为这只猫总是蜷伏着躺在她的脚边,费姨妈曾经把苏菲叫做“暖脚猫”。姨妈有点耳聋,所以有人来到她公寓门前的时候,苏菲先跑向门,通知姨妈有人来了。

时光流逝,可爱的苏菲越来越老。姨妈时不时地打电话给我,让我和她一起把苏菲带到兽医那里。事实上,我觉得姨妈照顾苏菲比照顾自己要好得多。如果她自己生病,总是不去看医生,往往只吃点阿斯匹林了事。但是,如果苏菲打了个喷嚏,或者因为喉咙里夹进了毛团咳嗽几声,我们基本上都是立即出发,去找兽医。

所以,当我听见电话里费姨妈的哭声时,感到有点惊讶。她歇斯底里地叫着:“苏菲死了!我的小苏菲死了!”

姨妈一边抽泣,一边向我说明情况:“你知道我晚上总是睡不好觉,医生给过我一些安眠药。我不愿意闻到安眠药的味道,医生就告诉我可以在药片上加一点香草精,这样药片闻起来就像是糖了。谁料想今天早上我在厨房做饭的时候,苏菲跑到我的卧室里,无意中打翻了安眠药瓶。她一定觉得那药味道很好,因为她几乎把药片吃完了。我发现的时候,她就躺在地上,旁边是空空的药瓶。”

费姨妈还是控制不住自己,一直在哭。“你知道我的苏菲和我呆在一起有多长时间吗?”不等我回答,她又接着说,“我们已经在一起12年了。昨天我还又给她买了一种新猫粮。人家都说这种猫粮更容易咀嚼和消化,适合上了年纪的猫吃……她的牙齿开始脱落了,跟我的一样。你知道苏菲对我来说意味着什么吗?”

我非常同情姨妈。

“我该怎么做?”她哽咽着问我。

“姨妈,很抱歉,事情已经这样,你做什么都救不活苏菲了。把她的遗体装进纸袋,然后放在地下室的垃圾箱里,环卫部门的人会把她带走。”

“什么?”她惊叫起来,“把我的苏菲放在垃圾箱里?她像我的孩子一样!自从你姨夫去世,她就成了我最亲密的朋友,这么多年来一直都是。我绝不会把她放进垃圾箱里去!”“好吧,”我说道,“今晚我会加班到很晚,所以不能过去看你了。可是,如果你觉得这个主意还不错,就打车去找兽医吧,请他把苏菲送到动物公墓去埋葬。买墓地的钱,还有丧葬费,都由我来出。”

姨妈的泪水还是不停地流。“我能不能经常去看她?”

“当然可以。什么时候你想去宠物公墓,我就带你去。”

“那我怎么带苏菲到兽医那儿去?用来带她到处走的那只专用小箱子几年前就坏了。”

“把她放在你的旧手提箱里好了。手提箱不大不小,把苏菲装进去正合适。”

“会给苏菲举行一个葬礼吗?”

“不会,亲爱的。兽医打电话叫看管宠物墓地的人来,那些人会把苏菲放进小小的棺材里面,然后带她到墓地去。”

“好吧。”姨妈悲伤地喃喃自语。“那会让苏菲死得有尊严吗?”她问道。

“会的。”我回答。

事情真是这样,我为姨妈感到难过,但又没有别的办法。

那天晚上大约6点钟的时候,费姨妈打电话到我办公室:“阿诺德,我有事告诉你。”奇怪,我觉得她的声音很激动。

“你去过兽医那儿了吗?”我问。

“我是照你说的做了。把苏菲放在我的手提箱里。在公共汽车站等出租车的时候,我心想,既然可以坐公交车去,为什么我非要花钱打的呢?所以我把手提箱放在脚边的地上,拿出钱包,想看看我是否正好有零钱。我正往皮夹子里看的时候,几个十来岁的男孩子从我身后走过来,其中一个男孩一把把我推到地上,抢过我的手提箱跑了!而苏菲还在手提箱里!”

“啊?怎么会这样!你受伤了吧,姨妈?”

“没什么大不了的,只是皮肤擦伤。我大声叫警察,可是没有人来。我还能怎么样呢?我想,我和苏菲注定就要这样分开了,所以就自己回家了。”

“真不敢相信!”我说,强忍住不笑出声“当那几个男孩打开手提箱,却发现里面是一只死猫,脸上会是什么表情!你能想象得出来吗?”

她笑起来。费姨妈真的在笑!

“等一下,等等……还没说完呢。苏菲今天回来了!实际上她没死!是我觉得她死了,因为我今早上在卧室发现她的时候,她躺在那儿一动不动。后来在手提箱里晃来晃去的,一定把她惊醒了。我回到家的时候,发现她就在门口等我!”

我听见姨妈又说:“阿诺德,谢谢你这么帮助我。我曾向上帝祈祷,请上帝让她上天堂。最后,她回到了我身边。”

我又一次去看望费姨妈的时候,发现她在前门上贴了一个小条,上面写着:“这里是天堂”。

你知道吗

Arnold Fine阿诺德·法恩

Arnold Fine阿诺德·法恩,美国作家,犹太人后裔,50年来一直是《犹太人报》资深新闻编辑和幽默专栏作家。《犹太人报》是在美国出版的周报,由肖洛姆·克拉斯和拉斐尔·施雷伯创建于1960年,采编纽约、美国和以色列的犹太新闻。每周他都在《犹太人报》上发表他的幽默专栏“我记得当时”。在为《犹太人报》工作的同时,阿诺德·法恩还在纽约西南部布鲁克林区的一家特殊教育高中教授残疾和智障的孩子。他还担任过国王郡社区学院的兼职教授。阿诺德·法恩曾两次被提名为纽约州的“年度教师”。

词汇寻解

New Words

snuggle vi。躺;偎依

alert vt。使警觉,使意识到;警告adj。警惕的,警觉的;留心的

sneeze n。喷嚏v。打喷嚏

vanilla n。香草

sympathize vi。同情,怜悯;支持

sanitation n。环境卫生;卫生设备;下水道设施

cemetery n。公墓;墓地,坟场

grab vt。攫取;霸占;将……深深吸引vi。攫取;夺取n。攫取;霸占;夺取之物

jostle vt。推挤,撞;争夺vi。竞争,争夺;推挤n。推撞,挤拥

T

考考你

est Yourself

1.Multiple Choice Questions

1)Good old Sophie,the cat,was getting on in years。

A。穿上;戴上B。(人)变衰老,上年纪

C。继续做,进行下去D。(使)取得进步

2)They said this cat food was softer for older cats。

A。更柔软的B。更容易弯曲的

C。更安稳的;更舒适的D。易咀嚼和消化的

3)I'll provide the money for the plot and the burial。

A。小块土地B。情节C。阴谋D。平面图

2.你知道关于alert的短语吗?(写出两个)

3.在文中出现了grab这个词,下面的句子或短语中的grab是什么意思,你知道吗?

1)to grab a bus

2)The film didn't grab me。

Keys:

1.1)B2)D3)A

2.1)on(the)alert警惕着,警戒着,警觉着;提防着,防备着;密切注意着;随时准备着

2)put(或place)on(the)alert(军队)处于戒备状态

3.1)匆忙地做;赶 短语意为:赶公共汽车

2)[美国俚语]给……留下深刻印象;强烈感染(或吸引);影响;强烈吸引;使……作出反应

句子译为:这部影片没有给我留下印象。